Saturday, January 21, 2012

My Journey

I grew up in a Christian home with loving parents and two beautiful sisters.  I am so very thankful for my family and the things that they instilled in me throughout my life.  They always encouraged me to be myself, while giving me advice and loving me unconditionally.  I am now blessed with two brother-in-laws, a beautiful niece and three handsome nephews.  My family is a huge part of my journey.  

I was grounded in all the basics of church and being a Christian and saved at a young age.  It wasn't, however, until I was an adult that I truly understood and developed a relationship with God. From that relationship, I have embarked on an incredible Journey with God.  I want to be a part of fulfilling the Great Commission, taking God's love to the ends of the earth.... let's start with Honduras.

Reflections from my journals....

September 2002:
My first mission trip was to Choluteca Honduras.  I realized quickly, that I was out of my comfort zone, things don’t always go as planned and I had to totally and completely depend on God to do anything there.  I thought that I went to ‘help people’, but the things God taught me that week through the Hondurans and my teammates impacted the path of my future more than even I realized at the time.  My prayer at the end of the week was “Lord, help me to not be satisfied with my comfortable life any longer. Use me to reach others for you.”

September 2003:
I hadn’t intended to go back to Honduras.  Through a chain of events and against many odds, I ended up going.  It was during that trip, as I prayed for the first time ‘Lord, show me how to best serve you. I surrender all.  Here I am, send me”.  (I was praying for direction in my life as to where to best serve.)

2004- Present
Several more mission trips (15 & counting) and repeated opportunities to see God's miracles, make incredible friends and be a part of His movement in Honduras.  Each trip taught me more about God, made me love the Hondurans even more and left me less satisfied with my 'comfortable life'.

One journal entry reveals “I love it here. I love the culture and the enthusiasm with which they worship. I could stay here forever.”

I prayed that God would tug on hearts and bring people to help with the ministries of Faith Home and Honduras. (not thinking me-others) lol

In my journal, I wrote about how blessed I am and how I want to use those blessings for God’s glory.  “Lord, I put my life in your hands.  I give it all to you. Show me your will and I will follow.”

February 2010:
As I sat praying in front of the team house at Faith Home in Honduras, looking up at the surrounding mountainside, I once again prayed ‘Here I am Lord, send me’.  I clearly heard Him say to me ‘If you really are willing to go where I send you, then get ready. Sell your house and get things in order. Get ready to go.”

I’d like to say that I ran home, sold my house and immediately followed God to where I belonged, but I didn’t.  Instead, I immediately began a quest to seek God deeper, ‘find myself’, and try to figure out on my own where I belonged and what that meant.  I spent countless hours alone with God in the woods, at the lake and on the many road trips to visit friends.  There were so many opportunities to help people around me that I kept pretty busy and justified that it was enough.

During the course of 2011, I finally acknowledged that God’s call was Honduras.  I sought more information on mission opportunities and began to ponder the possibilities of what that would look like.  I tried to compromise with God that I could be of more benefit in the States, promoting the mission work there and helping on short-term trips.  I still wasn’t ready to let go of my ‘comfortable life’, my family, my friends, my church….MY life.

In September 2011, as we worshipped with the Hondurans at a new church plant site in Pimiento, I was overwhelmed.  No more empty words to God, no more compromising…just obey.

I sent an email to the director of General Baptist International Missions and told him that Honduras is where I belong and I am ready to go.  I have spent the past few months going through the process of becoming a full time missionary to Honduras.  I will live at the General Baptist orphanage Faith Home working where needed there, in the communities and churches and with the children of Faith Home.

As I prepare for this part of the journey, the scripture came to mind about counting the cost.  That’s what I’ve been doing over the past several months, counting the cost of going.  I’ve cried many tears over the last time, for a while, that I will possibly do things with my family, church and friends.  I’ve appreciated those little moments that I often took for granted and I’ve done my best to give it everything I’ve got to be ‘all here’, while I’m here.  I know it won’t be easy, but I also know that no cost is too great if I’m following God’s voice.  He will take care of me and everyone I leave behind.

One of the difficult things for me to accept is the fact that in order to be a full time missionary, I must let go of my pride and fear of speaking in front of people in order to raise the support necessary to go.  I have always been an independent person and have searched for ways to be self-supportive so I wouldn’t have to ask for financial support.  I think that is another lesson God is teaching me.  I say I will give Him all of me, but I wouldn’t let go of my independence and pride and trust Him to take care of that as well.  The one thing we hold on to is the one thing God requires the most.  He wants all of us.

So here I am, continuing the journey with God.  I am ready and willing to be obedient to His call, but I need your prayers and support to do what He has called me to do.

I am excited to see how God is using the children of Faith Home to reach their own country for Him.  They will be the hands, feet and heart of God to their country.  This is an awesome journey…for all of us!

Let the journey continue…..